Health and safety scarf

There's some dangerous crochet patterns being aired at Liza Smith's Fluffycloud Studios blog.

Liza has carried out a risk assessment on this airy 1970s crochet scarf and come to the correct conclusion that it is too dangerous to make, due to the excessive length. Our health and safety officers have cordoned off the offending item, and may be carrying out a controlled explosion in due course.

We should just be thankful that the tassels on that waistcoat don't dangle all the way down to the floor.